Suddenly Single and Seeking Validation Part 1

Hey there Youtubers, this is Pete and Alice having another very great and very insightful conversation and today's topic is validation. Validation it's a kind of a small  word but it means a whole lot of different things on different levels and so here we go we're just talking about it and do we need it how do we get it? Why do we need it and what do we do with it? So what are you doing right now? 

Alice McCracken Hurst

I am walking my diva my my queen of the castle 

You

Right 

Alice McCracken Hurst

And getting her exercise in and letting her smell every bite of grass, which is what she loves 

You

See and I think because of course I'm gonna try to circle back into validation because you know the irony of that is in someway when you love your pet like that and you're taking them out you I have learned that you know he's a little person too. he's a little diva and himself he has his needs and wants and when I take him for a walk instead of yanking them around then OK we gotta go. We gotta go. I'm like letting him sniff the roses and I'm kind of learning from him how to do that myself that's validation you know I'm validating his needs. Cell 

Alice McCracken Hurst

Well, I have never thought of it that way and a year or so ago I told a friend I said you know with my dog who passed away in 22 I said I just let Josie lead the way and my friend so I've always heard you're supposed to be the leader the master and I said yes if I'm walking her for a purpose and we have a time limit, but if it's her one of her three or four walks a day I want her to be the leader and if that's not OK with the books then it's not OK. I feel good about it. 

You

You know I see that's such a great point right there because you know with Cesar I don't know his last name called Cesar Romero, the dog whisperer you know he was all about this domination thing and I think you and I talked about that a little bit because my good new friend recommended a book and an author who writes about this you know a 

Alice McCracken Hurst

No 

You

dominant society versus a cooperative society. It's very very interesting. The point of view and you know that's another part of human nature is this kind of dominant subordination thing which can really get out of control so you know the funny thing here is that if you were sensitive person and you're thinking about things like we do then you're gonna analyze these things and you're gonna say well what does this mean or what should I do? But we both kind of said in our opening how we validate our own dogs and then reverse or in the reciprocation they validate us you know I do you know if I was walking while I am talking to myself. I'm talking to you right now, but if I was just walking around the house talking to myself then I'll be walking around talking to myself. If I have the dog, I'm talking to him he agrees you know what I mean so it's kind of. It's funny that way they're they're sounding boards. 

Alice McCracken Hurst

Exactly 

You

And so kind of on the point of validation So what I found what you started before we start recording you said something about your own sense of validation so go ahead and start with that. Do you feel that need to be validated everything every time you think something or say something or do something? 

Alice McCracken Hurst

No, and I am, I had never even thought about it till you brought it up this morning. I believe the reason. That I don't feel that way anymore I used to is because I'm much more connected to who I am now than I was in the past in other words I feel like I know myself more deeply. I don't rush to decisions. I'm not in a hurry as much, and some of the time I make a decision. If I'm in doubt, I'll ask someone I trust to you know give me their opinion 

You

That's a big statement right there 

Alice McCracken Hurst

However However, if I'm not in doubt, and I feel like I've spent enough time thinking about it, checking it out with myself and then waiting instead of being in a hurry I don't feel like I need to check it out, but when in doubt, I definitely do check things out 

You

You know 

Alice McCracken Hurst

But 

You

that 

Alice McCracken Hurst

validation, I don't think I'm a check things out more than what them validate 

You

OK, all right 

Alice McCracken Hurst

I don't know if that makes sense but 

You

Well, it does and what doesn't make sense that I have to stop the tape and start it again because I just don't wanna lose this stuff. I wanna have segments instead of losing it so I'm gonna stop the recording and then I'm gonna start it again. I'll tell you when I start it again stop.